Zac Beuzeville was just 20 years old, full of life and part of a big, busy family living just outside Orange when he took his own life on July 1.

It has now been 35 days since Sharon, her husband Fred and their family were shattered by Zac’s death, and she is determined to get people to talk about suicide.

“He was only a 20-year-old boy and suicide is not spoken about, it’s swept under the carpet,” she said.

“It’s devastated each and every one of us.

“I think all of us are asking the questions, what could we have done? Why didn’t we see more? Why didn’t we pick it up?”

Mrs Beuzeville contacted the Central Western Daily to share Zac and her family’s story and to get people talking about suicide.

Zac had suffered from anxiety all his life and had been in touch with Beyond Blue, but in the month before he died things had been worse.

“People with a mental illness are stigmatised by society,” she said.

“If people could talk about it and start treating it like an illness rather than something taboo.

“You can’t see your brain or your feelings.

“Everyone talks about the car accidents, we need to talk about this.”

In the month since Zac’s death the Beuzeville family have become even more tight-knit.

“He was a tough little cookie, he was there to pick everyone else up but didn’t let anyone else pick him up,” Mrs Beuzeville said.

“He was the first to stand up for someone.”

Mrs Beuzeville said her life since July 1 had been a roller-coaster and she had good days  and bad.

“I think what if? What could I have done? You’re forever asking questions,” she said.

“I don’t think I’ll ever have the answers.

“I feel empty, confused ... if I could stop this happening to one person, it’s a horrible thing.

“I just take one day at a time, it’s my first thought and my last thought.”

Orange Suicide Prevention Network member Jamy Somerville said Zac’s suicide was one of five local suicides she knew of so far this year.

As someone who has been bereaved by suicide following her own father’s death almost seven years ago, she said there was a lack of support services for people left behind.

“You can go to your GP and hope that they can refer you to someone who has experience in the area,” she said.

“There’s a lot of programs around, just none locally.”

Support is available for anyone who may be distressed by calling Lifeline 13 11 14.

nadine.morton@fairfaxmedia.com.au