Ben Gosper? Washed up.
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Mitch Britt? A know-it-all.
Ed Morrish? Scared to death.
Those were the three assessments dished out by former Barbarians big man Mick Newman on Friday as the United Warriors lock plans to wipe the floor with his old playing partners on Saturday afternoon.
The Warriors are one win away from sealing a Wallerawang Landscaping Cup finals berth as the committee still hasn't confirmed whether the postseason will feature the top four or the top five.
And while that fact is up in the air, the Wade Park derby could very well decide who grabs the last remaining finals spot.
Mick Newman will settle into lock after playing a couple of games in the halves and can't wait to go head-to-head with his opposite number as Ben Gosper will don the number 13 for Barbarians (as he so often does).
"I'm not silly enough to run straight at him," he laughed.
"He's getting a bit old, though. So, I might throw the left foot at him and see how he goes. I know he's got a soft spot for Newman so I should be right."
And the hit list for Newman doesn't end there... Mitch Britt is set to throw on a guernsey for Barbarians and Saturday and while he's not sure if the pair will come into contact with each other, he made his opinion of the playmaker clear.
"Well, Mitch Britt's always right so that will help him out," he said.
"He's crafty, though... he's playing with a new backline so we'll see how we go."
Ed Morrish is the only mentioned player who won't gear up for Barbs as the tall drink of water has been bagging tries for Emus second grade every Saturday.
"We won't hold that against him," Newman said.
"He's probably just scared."
On a more serious note, Newman's aware of the significance of Saturday's clash and says his side's looked the goods at training and will welcome a key member of its roster into the halves.
"Sam Sweeting's playing his first game of the year so that's a big plus for us," he said.
"Training this week has been the best it's been all year. The vibe was really good and we had our best ballwork session so far.
"The belief for us as a playing group is that we can beat any team we've played so far. We don't need to focus as much on who we're playing as we do ourselves."
And as Kurt Beahan's mentioned on so many occasions thus far, the goal for United is to perfect the simple aspects of the game.
"We want to be disciplined and not let the hype get to us," he said.
"Our kick chase is something that needs to be good as well.
"Barbarians are a much better side than what they were in round one so it will be a tough game."
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